A 24 Roll of Film

A 24 Roll of Film   

    A roll of 24 film can slow you down, ground you, allow you to see the wonders and magic of the ever day life.  Mundane, simple, quiet.  These are the moments that become memories that become our story.

We live in a world that can feel filled with chaos and madness, and faster and faster and faster we must go.  The world keeps spinning and we keep moving and our story keeps happening until, we decide to slow it down, quiet it all and let ourselves tell the story of us.    And for me, that begins with a new roll of film and that wonderful click. 

    When we had our first daughter my husband and I had a conversation with each of our families.  We told them that she will be kept offline and if anyone wants updates, they are more than welcome to come over or call us.  We got some push back but mostly everyone understood and respected our boundary.  Now, my first daughter is 5 and I would say in those few years since social media has changed.  We were are now in a time where oversharing is the norm and to carve out any privacy is difficult.  

    In this world we have become accustomed to over documenting our lives.  When we introduce film into our stories we have no choice but to slow down.  With film you only have 24 (very expensive) frames to work with.  The images we choose to document must be a moment that makes us take pause, set up the frame, wait for the moment and shoot. Rolling the film forward, to wait for the next memory.  Film is a process.  We must purchase the rolls, put them into the camera, wind it, have knowledge of the right exposures, focus, frame the image, and then one perfect click.  Film is a plan, and time to slow down and see what is happening right in front of you.  Once the image is taken then that is it, there is no looking at the image and having a re-do, you won't know for weeks and by then that image becomes the only story from that day.  It is no longer an image but a memory.  Film gives us permission to slow down, step into the moment and become the observing and present artists, friends, partners, parent.  

    Since picking up my film camera more often I can see the positive impact it has had.  There are moments I want to laugh and quickly document a moment with my phone but, I remind myself this moment is just for us.  This memory won't be 'documented' but it will become part of us still.  They will remember me as the mama who laughed along.  They will know my smile, the way my eyes lit up, how I lunged into a tickling hug after.  They will know me and see me and remember me because I was there, not running to 'quickly' grab my phone.  I have seen a change and I want to get even deeper and more honest and slower because time is a thief and she is already taking it too quickly, I am not going to spend it rushing around with my phone.  I will spend it here, with them and my 24 roll of film.   

Just Be

I have lost track of time

Days have started to blend together.

Not that I want them to

Not that I need them to

Not that I have any say on what time decides to do.

But, 

The days keep moving

The sun keeps setting

The moon keeps rising

Hair keeps growing

Pants keep shortening

And we keep on rotating 

Around and 

Around and 

Around we go

Until

We Stop

We Pause

We Look

We Just 

Be.

In this tiny moment in time

For a 

Lifetime.  

Poem By: Emma McCormick